It’s Not about the Bride

As we sat reminiscing about our wedding day just a couple days after the 23rd, we recounted all those lovely parts of a wedding celebration.

Even so, it wasn’t all beauty and pretty smiles. There were tears and stressful moments.  No part of life is simply perfection, not even a wedding day. But there were some especially memorable moments that made it a magical day. And all these moments had something in common: they were about others, not about us.

To begin, our God made the day possible. He brought us to this point. He helped us walk down the aisle. We listened to “I Love You Lord” before we said our vows, and I do believe that we made a sweet sound unto our God whom gave us the wedding day and has granted us the great responsibility and privilege of a marriage.

Then, we had the funniest, most entertaining, cutest, happiest flower girls. They kept the bridal party laughing with their exclamations, explorations, and discoveries of dirt, bugs, and rocks. Right before we all walked down the aisle, Delaney (in her fluffy tutu and in her 2 year old enthusiasm) clapped her hands and exclaimed “OK, c’mon guys!!” . She gave us a pep talk and laughter right before we walked down. And Brooklyn with her wide-eyed innocence assured me that she loved me. They were the best.

And the people of our church were so helpful. To see members from my church vacuuming the house and cleaning the toilet was more fun than getting ready to walk down the aisle. Women from our church grabbed the boxes of decor and jumped right in.

Someone picked up my flowers. Someone put them together. Someone brought over the dresses from my Grandma’s house. Someone packed our getaway truck with snacks for our hungry stomachs and cupcakes from the wedding for our enjoyment. Someone made sure we had paper plates and napkins and wet wipes just in case our hands got sticky. Someone prepared our cake cutting knife. Someone found baskets for the flower girls. Someone substituted something for the floral tape that I lost in the shuffle of wedding preparation. Someones. Numerous someones who cared about me and Ben. That’s more beautiful than the pictures that were taken that day.

The groomsmen were helpful. While I wasn’t with them for most of the wedding day, they were there to get Ben and me plates of food, set up chairs for the wedding, and be on time for pictures…because the bridal party sure wasn’t.

My bridesmaids were WONDERFUL. Bekah did my makeup and Mattie did my hair. Hannah applied my lip color. Cheyenne took pictures. Lansy provided comic relief. And we all ate ice-cream bars together in the process. I don’t know who said you’d be too nervous to eat on your wedding day. Because I wanted to eat ALL day. And ice-cream was so delicious. We hid in our bedroom and prepared for those few short hours that took so much planning.

My family could not have been more excited or helpful. My cousin took video footage of the whole day. My other cousins played beautiful music for the wedding even though it was a little windy out. My dad set up his game for the groomsmen. My mom made coffee and gave her concerns kindly to my awesome wedding coordinator who is also my aunt. My brother was always there to give me a hug and my sisters (also maids of honor) were there to express the stress I was careful to conceal. They know me like that.

My soon-to-be mother was quick to offer up prayers. My sister-to-be wrote on all the chalkboards. My friend and roommate from my first year away from home took the most amazing pictures that captured our personalities in a way that only she can. And even the students whom I spent so much time with in the school helped out on this day. Jolynn made sure the drinks were topped off and Courtney and Ericka kept the popcorn going.

Pastor Ron, our officiator, was wonderful at communicating throughout the whirlwind days of a wedding and was also quick to make us laugh when we stood at the altar sincerely pledging our lives to each other.

And all the people who came…..I did not see a face who did not want to be there. I did not see a frown. The comment that most made me smile was from an elderly gentleman who said, “I don’t usually like weddings, but this was fun!” Thank you, kind sir. Look around you, everyone here made that fun possible.

So whoever said that the wedding day was about the bride has everything backwards and completely wrong. I simply walked down the aisle and pledged my life to my Love. Everyone else pulled so much together. Everyone else made it enjoyable. Everyone else contributed care and love and that made the wedding day memorable. The moments were made magical not by the day or the idea of a wedding, but by the people who came and cared for Ben and me.

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More on Marriage:

Married Or Not 

It’s the People Not the Production

Marriage Isn’t Boring