Life at the Blue House

Summer of Lullabies

It’s the sound of a fish tank and an old black fan. The creak of a rocking chair painted by his Grandma. . . the word Grow stretched across the arm. Reminding me every night that watching him grow up is so, so good. That time goes to beautiful and good places.

It’s his breathing, eyes slowly welcoming sleep.

It’s the sound of my voice singing, because he can’t sit still for books anymore. And he still loves “Goodnight, Goodnight Construction Site,” but he loves moving more.

One night I began singing “You are My Sunshine,” as part of our nightly routine, because one of my nurses had that as a tattoo, her special song between mother and daughter. She told me her Sunshine story as we worked to bring my son into the world and now that song is my way of carrying her story on into another family.

So it’s the sound of stories meeting up and weaving togehter. And my son never really went back to books after lullabies.

It’s the sound of childhood and motherhood both being experienced for the first time. We’ve learned we’re safe to grow up togehter.

It’s the sound of the song “God Is So Good,” but I make up a lot of verses.

I love who you are. I love who you are. I love who you are. And God loves you too.”

“He’ll help you grow strong. He’ll help you grow strong. He’ll help you grow strong. He’s so good to you.”

“I’m here for you. I’m here for you. I’m here for you. And God’s here for me.”

So, it’s the sound of a lullaby sung for the mother, too. I’m not alone.

It’s the sound of the day closing, how we lived and laughed and grew. Grow has never been such a beautiful word.

The fish tank bubbles and the fan whirs it’s steady pace, the rocking chair creaks. Who knew the second-hand rocking thing could be an instrument?

And I sing “I love you, Lord and I lift my voice to worship you, O my soul, rejoice. Take joy, my King in what You hear. May it be a sweet, sweet sound in Your ear.”

And I think all those sounds must be sweet to God’s ears. Love is here. The life He’s given us is here. Worship is here. And so we sleep in peace.

Summer birthday and broken record lullabies. The old, creaking rocking chair holding our hearts growing up.

God is so good.

And here is sunshine.

Even at night.

Life & Learning

A Should-Be-Easy Job & Those Four Kids

I walk into work every day and it’s like a minefield of mistakes waiting to blow up in my face. The question is where……when….and how bad will this mistake be?! I am discovering that whiteout doesn’t fix all my problems and wishing that the little plastic bottle would just come to my aid and magically abra-cadabra my mistakes away. But then, I wouldn’t really want that…because even I have to laugh at myself! Last week, I graded papers wrong, and locked my keys in the classroom.

This week…

This week…

Wait for it…

This week…I found myself at a printer. A wonderful, should-be-easy printer…HA. I am punching keys over and over again and totally missing the one or maybe two things that I need to press in order to print one copy of each Spelling test IV. Beep. Wrong. Beep. Wrong. Beep. WRONG AGAIN. I’m so looking forward to the moment that I can check this little should-be-easy job off my school checklist. Beep. Beep. Beep. Definitely not that button.  Continue reading “A Should-Be-Easy Job & Those Four Kids”

Life & Learning

3 Minutes

I have 3 minutes to write. I vowed (or practically vowed) to go to bed at 11:30 pm. Yet, here I am….writing with 2 minutes to go. I have been thinking a lot about life and death. When a pastor from San Diego dies suddenly of a heat attack, you think.

When a popular star commits suicide, you consider.

When you have loved ones and countless people you care for, you worry.

And my 3 minutes is over.

Though, I’m not finished yet. Continue reading “3 Minutes”