Marriage Chronicles

29 Lessons Marriage Has Taught Me

Over the month of February, I’ve used this blog’s Facebook page (check it out!) to daily share one thing I’ve learned since I got married last May. There are still a few days left for you to join the series! Let me just say that the lesson I’m sharing today is one that I’m really, really passionate about! So join our Facebook community to see it! 😉

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I decided to share the 29 lessons in two blog posts, because 29 is a big number of lessons to squeeze into one sitting.  Your eyes might get tired! So anyway,  here goes!

1. I’ve learned to keep track of the small love things…

Small acts of love make huge imprints, and yet they are the easiest moments to forget. Keep tabs on what matters. Not the stuff that frustrates, but all the times, countless times, love has been offered.

  • chocolate pie
  • red heart balloons (twice!)
  • tea
  • unexpected Dutch Bros
  • all the walks
  • and so much more.

2. Silence is good.

I don’t need to talk him out of his frustration or talk him up to a good mood. I just need to give him space to mentally work through the hard things. I need to stop talking.

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3. STOP & think about our life.

It’s easy to forget everything. It all gets so routine that the good things get mushed into bland, ordinary moments. Take a minute, think back, gratitude restored, thanking God fully.

4. Loves needs a place.

We eat at our kitchen table 5 nights a week. Because we need to slow down together, nurture love by conversing, forgoing distractions, and focusing on our relationship. Continue reading “29 Lessons Marriage Has Taught Me”

lifestyle

Let Me Tell You How It Is

I wrote this a year ago just 2 days before getting engaged. Ben and I have always been simple dwellers and our engagement was nothing fancy. Truth be told, Ben was still weak from a terrible flu and I was still in my regular bouts of chronic pain when he asked me to marry him (I’ll post more about that later).

But on the 21st, before that big day that started all the busy days, I was inspired to write about our relationship in a raw way. Because relationships aren’t full of fancy surprises and big events. Their full of small moments, little choices, and yes, and occasional bout of wonder. I wanted to tell my friends how it really is in a relationship. 

  And then, I came to the end of the post with the realization that I couldn’t dictate what other relationships looked like. I couldn’t really tell anyone how it is—I could only really say that a relationship–imperfect, flawed, & wonderful—is worth living no matter the moments tossed your way.

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******

Let me tell you how it is.

Honestly— Continue reading “Let Me Tell You How It Is”

Life & Learning

Confessions of the Engaged (Insane?) Woman

Just 21 days until…ya know…the day. And I may be am going  delusional, but I gotta say there are some {more} things that I’m preeeeetttty sure need to be said about this whole “engagement process.” Ready? Bring your laughing hearts. I just need to get these out.

The planning never ends…ever…ever. Because, oh my dear, we are getting down to the tablecloths & that is the important stuff of life.

Example: I dreamed in wedding plans the other night. I worked out details and problems and totally beasted that dream….only to wake up stiff as ever with none of the plans accomplished and a very bad headache from the intensity of it all. Lovely, lovely. Just 21 more days, my heart. You can do it.

Aww, look how gloriously unaware we were of all the work ahead?
Aww, look how gloriously unaware we were of all the work ahead.
The details don’t sleep.

 Clarification: I’m not psyching myself out about the wedding. Promise. But the details are! All those little chums fighting for my attention.I often sometimes say no and let them fight their little hearts out. They can wait till morning, but my sleep can’t. And then usually, I fight those guys to the death and check them right off of my to-do list. Check. Check. Check, Check, Check. Check. Checking things off a to-do list is my new only hobby.

Continue reading “Confessions of the Engaged (Insane?) Woman”

Life & Learning

5 Things Girls Should Know about Being Engaged

Here is my equivalent of a Valentines Day post. It’s much more practical than the mushy post that you probably already saw on your News feed today. For now, it’s just some practical & quite humorous thoughts on being engaged.

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1. It’s really not cutesy & magical.

Yeah, I’m watching all of your dreams burn to the ground (OK, maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration). But the truth is, you and your man are actually just the same people in the same life. While frilly, fluffy, lovey dovey excitement is unavoidable…it’s not there 24/7. Trust me. Also, those cutesy pictures that engaged girls seem to post all the time….

i.e.

“I said yes to the dress!”

“WEDDING REGISTRY!”

“Flowers from my hubby-to-be, cause we are in the double digits!” 

WELL…there is absolutely nothing wrong with excitement. SNAP, I’m thrilled to be getting married soon, but there is actually just a lot of hard work that goes into those statues and pictures. Girls have a way of arranging things to look just so & engaged girls can often make it look really cute, even if the process was not at all cute. Continue reading “5 Things Girls Should Know about Being Engaged”