It’s the People Not the Production

In June, I wrote a post entitled “It’s Not about the Bride”, it’s still true. I received our official wedding photos this week and the photographer (also a friend) did a magnificent job, going above & beyond in her work! Even more so, I am very happy to see that there were so many pictures taken of the people.  Brides should get it out of their heads that they need to create, decorate, and produce a jaw-dropping wedding that will astound the books and be the most beautiful thing ever.

Have we forgotten the people? The ones who help, who watch, who care, who clean, who do, who pray—who love. People with their animated faces and comforting smiles that assure you of their care, who come to your wedding, even if the ceremony is windy or sunny or cold. People who laugh and take pictures, who eat the food, and clap, and cheer. People who hug you and congratulate you, who are genuinely excited for this next step in your life.

Have we grown so self-centered that a wedding day has to be about the bride?–her beauty–her decorating taste–her magnificent pictures? Surely not.

Because

These are my cousins. They helped me pick the songs for our ceremony. They played even though it was windy. They looked sharp. They congratulated me, spent there time, and energy giving me this gift—beautiful music at our wedding.

These are my bridesmaids. I’m a practical sorta girl. So they helped me look my absolute best. Makeup–hair–nails. The whole 9-yards.

This is my cousin, Clay. He took video footage of the entire day, compiling multiple videos for our enjoyment. Because I asked him–because he cared enough to do it for me, for nothing in return.

Because

This lady who is genuinely smiling at her goofy husband, was someone who was always asking me how plans were going, and how my day had been. Her questions were invaluable and I am so thankful for her–someone whom I call  friend. Someone who asked me just days before the wedding how I was doing and listened to my rather emotional self on that particular Wednesday.

This is Bryndal, the woman with the curly hair and the happy smile. She was my co-worker. We folded laundry and talked about wedding plans, everything that was going right and everything that was going wrong. You see, she was planning a wedding at the same time as me. Our companionship  during these months was priceless.

This is Katie in the green dress. She helped me address wedding invitations. She listened to my excitement about the wedding day. She helped me tie all the crayons to the wedding programs with twine. She picked up my wedding dress from my Grandma’s house. She was and is invaluable.

This is Tammy in the white blouse. She cleaned the bathroom for my mom. It took a huge weight off of my mom’s shoulders. I walked by the bathroom and I  saw Mrs. Tammy bent over the toilet cleaning it thoroughly. And that made me so much happier than getting my nails done or seeing my hair fixed up. She cared so much  that she cleaned our toilet for us.

This is my beautiful Grandma. She took my measurements so that my dress would fit nicely. She helped me figure out the alterations needed. She kept the dress safe at her house. She pressed the dress to make sure it looked beautiful for the wedding day. I would not have known what to do without my wonderful Grandma Brock. She did so much for me.

Because,

This is my Aunt Yvonne. She was my wedding coordinator, the person who took my sketch of decor and gave it to the church ladies who carried out beautiful decorations, and some decor that I hadn’t even thought about. She answered all the questions & there were thousands, I bet! She knew what I wanted and carried it out. She was patient. She was capable. She did so much for us.

This is Pastor Ron in the gray suit. He did our marriage counseling, encouraged us during the last stretches of planning & waiting. He officiated our wedding ceremony and kept us laughing– he made us comfortable. He took care of sending in the marriage license. His help was invaluable.

This is Mrs. Jen standing behind the immaculate cake & cupcakes. She made these. She asked me what I wanted, and then did it. She used her creative ingenious to decorate them perfectly, because by the time I got around to planning cake stuff, my brain was fried! There were delicious, good-looking cupcakes for a lot of people! My guests would not have had something sweet if it weren’t for her & she did this as a gift for us.

And this is some of the decor that the ladies at my church put together. I don’t have pictures of all of the ladies, but I do have pictures of their work.

And this is the popcorn station. My cousin Courtney, and my friend Ericka spent most of the Reception serving people popcorn and making sure the popcorn was hot n’ ready.

Jolynn spent the Reception making sure the refreshment table was in good order. Lemonade, sweet tea, and water were available, because Miss Beth made sure they were there.

Because,

This is my Dad. He raised me, and taught me how to live life well. I will be forever grateful for my father figure, who always told me “a successful wedding is two people married at the end.”–who reminded me that our wedding’s chief goal was to glorify God. The day before my wedding–I needed that reminder.

This is my Grandpa who has written me letters, prayed for me fervently, and taught me by his example & his wise words. He prayed for Ben and me at our wedding & here you see him taking our picture. He was overjoyed for us.

This is Uncle David on the right. He’s married to my Aunt Yvonne & also helped coordinate the wedding. He listened to our concerns leading up to the wedding, kept the reception moving during the evening, auctioned off a cupcake just for honeymoon cash and then had us on our way to the honeymoon by 9:15! Fifteen minutes earlier than planned!

This is Charlie on the left—-Ben’s brother. He made sure that I had a cup of water and he grabbed me a plate of food before the ceremony started. His kindness really stood out to me.

This is my mother-in-law who showed us so much love during the wedding planning process–who grabbed my hands & prayed for me before the wedding ceremony. Her eyes spoke love and I know that I am still covered in that same joyous love.

This is my Mom who helped plan the wedding, tossed around good ideas for the wedding, sent me pins on Pinterest, and cheered me on. I am so thankful for her constant love in my life–she is my friend to this day.

This is my handsome brother who did SO much work on, before, and after the wedding day. He strung the white lights, helped build the wedding arbor, set up, cleaned up, and showed me love throughout the entire process.

These are my sisters who continuously love me and who gave me the most beautiful, touching speech–one that made me cry. They helped me so much on the wedding day!

These are all our guests. They clapped, congratulated, smiled, and loved us. There was a joy on this day from hearts that truly wished for our best. They gave us a beautiful wedding day. The majority of the people in this picture either helped us with the wedding or have been involved in our lives personally.  So you can plainly see that the wedding day is not about the bride.

Because,

When it’s all about the bride, this is what you miss out on.

The People.

The wonderful, loving, caring people who will bring more to a wedding day , than Pinterest, your plans, or the most lavish, brilliant details of a fantasy wedding.

A wedding lasts a day.

It has a beginning and an end.

And it only happens once.

But,

People last forever.