Spring at the Blue House (Starring Baby Goats!)

I walked into this year without any big dreams. My plan was to simply embrace and steward everything I had been given in 2018. Everything I am enjoying today is a choice I made last year. God gave opportunities to me in 2018 and then gave me the courage to say yes.

When I look back, I can’t believe how much I learned and experienced in a year. It was big and unlikely. I could not have imagined it for myself, but all of those big things started very small.


Potted flowers from the grocery store.

A hose (or two. . .thanks a lot, Frankie Tom!).

Two unexpected does in June.

A surprise billy goat in August.

Research on self-publishing.

A hundred other small decisions.

So. . . here we are in the springtime of 2019 and I’m stewarding the gifts I’d been given last year–goats, a porch garden, a published book, new and old relationships. It’s quiet and calm. It’s breathtaking and mundane.

And I’ll be honest, there have been some incredibly low moments this year. March swept in with spiritual warfare and the loss of our much loved (and quite hilarious!) billy goat. Stewarding what I had seemed a small thing to hold. Somewhat discouraging. Definitely beautiful.


My porch garden slowly came back to life in exuberance. Some plants died completely while others died back to come to life again. I am learning what it means and what it takes to garden. . .even in the smallest of places.


We planted from seed packets this year and are watching little green sprouts brave the journey. My daisies started their own idea of spring in February and have vibrantly met April with gusto!


The day after Easter, our Miss Margie decided it was the perfect afternoon to have her two little babies. It almost seemed like she waited for us to be there. Within 10 minutes of being home, her water broke.

I still can’t believe the perfect timing. We got to witness the entire beautiful process! Margie’s little buckling came first soon followed by an adorable black doeling.


The doeling is a spitting image of our buck, Nigel. I miss Nigel, but holding this little bundle of stubborn, zesty doeling is like having Nigel back in its own small way.


The pretty buckling is named Chester and the cutest black doeling I’ve ever seen is named Roxanne. The names just came to us as we watched the two babies in their first hours of life.


And I think the magic of stewarding what you’ve been given is that the gifts double. Maybe the gifts double in the form of two baby goats, or maybe the gifts double in the form of the beauty you get to experience because the gifts exist. Either way, my resolve to steward doubled in responsibility and magic all at once.


I’m not sure I’ve ever loved spring more, but it’s been a process to walk into 2019 with arms open wide. I’m keeping Psalm 112:7 close to me, “He is not afraid of bad news; his heart is firm, trusting in the Lord.”


As I tend to all I’ve bee given, I’m learning to enjoy life without fear of what may come or what may never come at all. It’s a year for standing still and seeing, for seeing and tending, for tending and giving thanks.


The magic has doubled in the quiet. The beauty has deepened in the middle. The rejoicing has strengthened after the storm. This is life with God. And history tells me I’m safe to open my arms even wider than this.

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A New & Glorious Morn

The December skies leading up to Christmas Day were beautiful. My husband would text me to go look at the sky. Vibrant colors melting into each other. Breathtaking.

Christmas Day was, perhaps, one of my most favorite Christmases I have ever experienced. I’ve been reading in John recently, and I found myself in John 10 for Christmas. It was perfect. “I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” What beautiful words! How true! I have tasted this truth and known it.

Ben and I had such fun exchanging gifts. There’s just something special about your fourth married Christmas and feeling more at home and loving these quiet family celebrations. Ben made eggs and bacon and we discovered that apple-wood bacon has the scent of Christmas.Β  Read more

Tis the Season of 2018

I looked forward to hosting my second Thanksgiving this entire year. I couldn’t wait for it! And it finally came with rain and friends. I love the memories I’m making in my twenty’s.

Ben cooked the turkey so I wouldn’t have to worry about it. I have also made the consecutive decision to skip the stuffing next year. It’s not that it tastes bad, but it looks gross. And unless you really like stuffing, people only take some because traditionally that’s just what you do (which means you inevitably have leftovers…and ummm….NO! πŸ™‚ )

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One Simple Tip for a Strong Marriage

In my first year of marriage, I’d get angry at Ben and be in huffy puffy clouds of silent smoke. I’d set up a little pity party, only invite myself, and sit there WAITING SILENTLY for my husband to GUESS his next right move. The moves better be right, you know! I bet you any spouse has done this. It’s an old trick in the book…that never works, of course.

It didn’t take long for me to realize that my husband couldn’t succeed because I’d purposefully blocked all roads to success. I gave him no help. I wanted him to fail. His failure made my pity party so much better. His failure further validated my hurt. His failure meant I had control. Oh, I’d never be pity partying for too long, but that’s a disgusting place to live nevertheless. Read more